What would they say if…?

I’ve often felt that a question can be more important than an answer.  Ask the wrong question and any answer becomes irrelevant for the most part.  At best it’s a brief waste of time. At worst, it can bring you down an extended rabbit hole, creating chaos and confusion for both you and your team.  Ask the right question and the answer, if based on facts and truth, becomes valuable not only for the data it provides but possibly for it having the potential to become a catalyst for more right questions and, quite often, a very interesting journey into enlightenment, reflection and effective problem solving.  Simply put, wrong questions set you on the wrong path and often do far more harm than good unless, of course, they are ignored which is probably the best outcome in that situation.  Ignore a right question however, well now you’re setting your team and yourself up for some trouble.  And to make matters more interesting, a good right question is often uncomfortable, which sometimes results in those kinds of questions being ignored far more often than they should be.

One of the more interesting right yet difficult questions I like to ask leaders is more of a fill in the blank form since you can insert as many interesting topics at the end of the question as you would like.  The line of questioning goes like this:  What would they (your team) say if…I asked them 1) how encouraging are you as a leader; 2) how much clear direction you give; 3) how do you handle respectful pushback; 4) how you perform under pressure; 5) whether you are consistent in your daily moods and approach; 6) whether they believe you have their backs when situations get dicey; etc.  The fill-ins are endless but the reaction to these kinds of questions is not.  I’ve found it usually comes in two forms, really.  The first is the small boss reaction. As you can probably guess, the small boss does not like any of these kinds of questions, particularly when they involve how their team perceives their leadership.  It’s as if that consideration boarders on the verge of meaninglessness.  After all, small bosses have impressed their bosses, landed the title, paycheck and perks (in other words, they managed up well) and now are endowed with the authority to act as they please within the parameters of the law, irrespective of their team’s opinion on any of the tough “What would they say if…” questions.  If anyone on the team has a problem or if the team as a whole has a problem with their leadership style, then they can hit the road and find another gig.  And find another gig they will.  As I’ve written in a previous article, today’s individual contributors, particularly the younger generation, are about fed-up with small boss behavior.  This is especially true in an environment where many of them can either work remotely for a competitor in a matter of hours or create their own side businesses and grow them while their small boss continues to remain blissfully ignorant about their adverse effects on their team.  As you can probably predict, small bosses who ignore this kind of questioning normally have high employee turnover and thus are probably more adept in new hire orientation than in the business they are running.  Small bosses don’t like these kinds of questions because they involve self-reflection and a critical self-analysis which, while eminently enlightening, can also be utterly painful and unpleasant because not all enlightenment is unicorns and rainbows. 

As you can also probably guess by now, BIG Leaders take a radically different approach to a question that asks them what their team thinks of them and how they are doing as a leader.  Granted, they are not interested in being a people-pleaser or winning a popularity contest (more on that in a future article I plan to write on the dangers of hiring “groupies).  BIG Leaders know making tough decisions is what they get paid to do (see my previous article on this topic) and many decisions are often not popular to at least some of their constituents.  Some decisions, in fact, can be downright unpopular to most of their constituents but need to be made to accomplish the mission in the short-term and/or achieve longer term objectives.  In these situations, the decision clearly involves a greater purpose than the comfort of the leader and his/her team. And yet, the BIG Leader knows that this often isn’t the problem.  We’re not dealing with a false dichotomy and it’s not about popularity.  It’s about whether or not you have a mere title or an enthusiastic following that will follow your lead even when your decision is unpopular.  That’s the difference and that’s why the BIG Leader embraces the “What Would They Say If…” question, maybe not with blind enthusiasm but with courageous open-mindedness so they can course correct on how they are doing as a leader, improve their effectiveness and lead their teams to excellence. 

So, what say you to this question reader?  Does asking a form of this question to your team make you cringe or does it make you curious?  The paradigm difference here can make all the difference in the world for you and your team.  So, this week, choose to not be a small boss who avoids facing the scrutiny of your team.  Be a BIGLeader who is boldly curious about what your team thinks of your leadership and how you can use that information to improve your impact on and effectiveness with them to achieve BIG results.

I help leaders achieve BIG results through coaching, training and leadership development.  Check me out at Bratti Innovation Group if you too are curious!

That’s all for me in this edition of the Small Boss/BIG Leader Series.  Have a blessed week!